I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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