Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
