i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
