found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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