dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Randomize
