we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
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