I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
