i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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