Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
