Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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