all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
