I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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