I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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