I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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