K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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