if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
