Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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