I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
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