is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I wish they made helmets for livers.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
