if i can run in heels then i can drive
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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