apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
why does every cop we meet know your name?
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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