People with herpes should wear stickers.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
