Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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