So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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