He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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