I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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