The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
