YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Ambien. No doubt about it.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
