I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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