I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
