"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
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