Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
