The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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