if you like me you must not know who I am
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
