my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
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