I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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