i was rollin on her like bob the builder
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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