WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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