Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
wat bout pragnant strippers??
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Randomize
