The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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