So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
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