I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
