The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
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