As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
