porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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