we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I'm determined to sit on that face.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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