so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Randomize
