Hey man sorry I got all grabby
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
