just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize