you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
